I’m a Quiet one
Hello Dear Followers,
I am going to share a little secret with you – I am quiet. I have been quiet my entire life, never really facing conflict head on, never speaking up, very introverted in how I lived my life. Only taking chances with situations when I felt I absolutely needed to or I would run the risk of losing sleep.
So you can probably see why I am a writer. Why my greatest form of communication is through the art of writing. It has always been the best way I communicated with the world. I was always a thinker, sometimes I have thought too much about things, never acting on anything always fearful what people might say to what I had to say.
I found a book titled “Quiet” by Susan Cain a few months ago. It grabbed my attention because it spoke to my personality, who I have been my entire life and I wanted to learn more about my personality and why I do the things I do.
Why spending time in a bookstore and why I collect books in general, why driving through the countryside in my car by myself is bliss. I wanted to learn more about all of this. Why I would prefer a night in a coffee shop or a dinner with friends much more than a loud and crowded club/bar.
I wanted to learn more about me.
When I told people on Facebook through my Facebook status that I was reading this book, a friend of mine called me a “Facebook extrovert” which is totally true, because as secluded as I’d prefer to be, I want to be heard and what better place can you be heard without physically being seen than Facebook?
I’ve often told people that I have always been awkward when it comes to speaking to people in social situations or with members of the opposite sex, my introverted self needs to feel you out, I need to see if it’s safe to get to know you before I allow myself to.
A friend of mine asked, ”Then how are you a journalist?” I told her I had absolutely no idea. The idea of talking to someone one-on-one and trying to pull answers out of someone was definitely not something I enjoyed doing especially in a social setting. But I did it for my job. It was somehow different. I did it because I had to.
Another friend of mine said to me recently “when something is bothering you, you should speak up, who cares?” He was very right, but I was never good at verbalizing my thoughts, because my thoughts are so many that sometimes what makes sense to me may not always to another person.
I’ve taken a lot of risks as an introvert, I’ve fought to fix things I have cared deeply about no matter how uncomfortable I am doing so. This is where my strength comes through. I’d rather run and hide than deal with anything head on, but I have.
I have spent my entire life always thinking, thinking, thinking and wondering and coming up with conclusions (eventually) that I may not have, if I hadn’t.
My mother and others who should be now know how introverted I am, still tell me I need to “come out of my shell” or “you need to speak up” etc. etc.
I feel more than I say, I see more than many people realize, as introverts often do.
So I right now I am reading “Quiet” and so far I would say I recommend it.
Until next time…