Smart or Beautiful?
Hello Dear Followers,
Over the years, my best friend and I have had several conversations ranging in various topics, in one of our conversations, I had asked what I thought was rather a simple question, “Why can’t people just be themselves?”
She answered immediately with, “Do you know how fuckin’ hard that is to do?”
I replied, “No, I don’t.” Because I didn’t. I didn’t know because I was always myself. Maybe it was pure ignorance, but I just didn’t know how to be anyone else.
She then said, “Well, I guess you have had a higher sense of self.”
I began to think at that point, whether there had been a time I wasn’t myself. But I couldn’t think of a one.
I recently began reading “Love Warrior” by Glennon Doyle Melton. A book that everyone (including the author) is calling “a book about marriage.” I suppose that is true, I just haven’t gotten to the marriage part yet.
I am in the beginning, where the author talks about who she was growing up or rather who she wasn’t.
She talks about how in her younger years she was always considered beautiful by those who came in contact with her. As I was reading this, several things she said struck me and it’s this:
“When strangers admire me, I practice returning their attention. I understand that beauty is a form of kindness. It is for giving away and I try to be generous.”
She goes on to say that her parents tried to instill balance in her life by telling her she was smart as well.
“I’m an early reader, and at four, converse like an adult.” “But soon I realize that smart is more complicated than beautiful….” “I begin to understand that beauty warms people and smart cools people.”
Let me preface this by saying, I am smart. Always have been, somewhat absent minded, but smart just the same. I grew up loving to read, I enjoyed history and studying people and the world around me. Beautiful wasn’t a word I would exactly use to describe myself.
As I have gotten older, I embraced all of these “smart” aspects me and accepting that I wasn’t physically beautiful. Sure, I have physical traits that I love, but I was never completely happy with it all.
People reading this might say things like, “Beauty only runs skin deep.” or “Think more of yourself, Daniela.”
I never wanted to play the dumb blonde to get noticed, I never knew how to flirt or if I did, I didn’t use it. I loved that I loved to read, I loved that I knew I thought differently than most girls my age, but does this get the attention of the opposite sex? No. You hardly get noticed.
Glennon goes on to talk about how she became someone else as she got older, having a “representative” of sorts, getting involved in things that could destroy anyone.
Anyway, I think this is an excellent and easy read, definitely worth diving into. While this is one of six books I am reading right now, I will definitely get back to you with more thoughts as I continue on with this book.
Until next time…